Page 28 - WilmU Spring Summer 2013

T hey were supposed to graduate
together.
He thought it would be roman-
tic – Glen and Donna, two soul
mates celebrating a momentous
accomplishment and embarking on their
lives together. She was working toward
her master’s degree in Human Resources
Management;
he had just
finished his
bachelor’s.
They were
engaged to
be married,
and it seemed
like their lives
would finally
be complete. Each had endured difficult
personal struggles and unhappy marriages
in their pasts, but together, they were joyful
and free.
But it was not to be. A tragic accident on
June 18, 2011, would put an abrupt and painful
end to that joy for Donna Smallwood. Glen
Thomas Costill was dead a er an 80-foot fall
off a ledge along Brandywine Park.
Losing her fiancé so young – age 42 – and
so unexpectedly was almost too much
for Donna to handle. She had never been
happier than when she was with her Glen.
A er his death, she found out from a friend
of theirs that Glen had been secretly plo ing
to marry her in an impromptu ceremony in
Maryland – the week a er Commencement.
“I thought we were going to get married in
November,” Donna, 52, says. “He was going to
surprise-marry me.”
A er Glen died, Donna put her studies
on hold. She couldn’t focus, couldn’t sleep,
couldn’t get out of bed. She questioned God
– Why him? Why not me? – and would break
down into uncontrollable sobs at inappropri-
ate moments.
“There’s so much I miss about him,” Donna
says, smiling through tears.
It was the simple things. The way she and
Glen went about their day, their light-
hearted jabs and juvenile, sometimes crude
jokes that only the two of them shared. His
laugh. His smile.
She could think of nothing else. So she
knew she would have to postpone grad
school until she could get herself together.
Donna a ended the Winter
Commencement ceremony in January 2011
to accept a posthumous degree on her
beloved’s behalf. But she was so overcome
with grief that she begged Glen’s son Jon to
do it instead.
“I could hardly get through the day,” she
says.
That year followed a similar pa ern. She
had days of extreme lows where she felt
like there was nothing le to live for. But
gradually, she gained enough strength to try
to finish that degree.
The reason, she says, was Glen.
“He would not have wanted me to be like
this,” she says. “He would want me to get up
and finish. I had to do it for him.”
So, exactly one year later, there was
Donna Smallwood again, this time in a
crowded back room in the Chase Center
– the “robing room” – looking weary, but
proud. Her son Phillip, she says, was in the
audience. He was the one cheering when
they called her name.
She had a tiny urn around her neck that
held Glen’s ashes, and a laminated memorial
card with Glen’s picture in her hand.
“He’s with me. I know he’s with me.”
This time, she would get up on that
stage. WU
Donna Smallwood accepted her master’s degree in Human Resources Management in December 2012
with a heavy heart – her fiancé, Glen Costill, was supposed to be graduating alongside her. Tragically, he
died in a fall before he could cross the stage with the love of his life. PHOTOBY SUSANGREGG
In Memoriam These two graduates never made it to Commencement, though they did finish their
coursework. So the loved ones they le behind gathered their strength and walked across
the stage to accept posthumous degrees.
BY JAIME BENDER
Glen Thomas Costill
1967-2011
Glen Thomas Costill
WILMINGTON UNIVERSIT Y MAGAZINE