Page 19 - Italian American Herald - June 2022

SPONSORED CONTENT
Kathleen Piperno is the first female partner of the Family Law Division of Eckel Sparks located in Media and West Chester. Family Law, her specialty, includes child support, custody, divorce, equitable distribution, protection from abuse, termination of parental rights and adoptions.
“No More”, as a survivor herself, Piperno has devoted her career to the fight against domestic violence and various organizations are benefactors of her volunteer efforts.
To those who lost their lives to domestic violence
To the heroes who heal victims and survivors
To the warriors who f ight alongside me against domestic violence
ITALIAN-AMERICAN HERALD
JUNE2022 | ITALIANAMERICANHERALD.COM 19
This message brought to you by The Family Law Division of Eckell Sparks, Attorneys at Law, Est. 1964
Chapter 15 ~ Daddy, Please Don’t
An excerpt from Fearless in Heels
Chapter 15, his aggressive, masculine pride consumed him as he destroyed her. She lost herself, one small
piece at a time, and was left broken. She took his threats seriously but stayed because leaving was too dangerous. She tossed and turned every night and fantasize about her escape.
Their young son watched the abuse from behind his bedroom door, from under his bed and from inside their closet. When all hell broke loose, Daddy chased Mommy and then threw her face-first into the stove. Mommy’s little boy rushed to comfort her and bravely said, “I’ll clean you up mommy”. He grabbed a bag of
it causes. The traumatic events that he witnessed impacted the way that he coped and healed.
He became the monster that his father was, his young daughters peeking through the spindles of the railing as they watched the blood slowly leak from Mommy’s nose and skull, while Daddy begged her to wake up.
Calmly, they pulled out
peas from the freezer and said “hold this on your face just like on the TV commercials and I will
walk you to bed.”
He remained her protector for as long
as he could and he vowed “I’ll be a good father and husband someday, nothing
like him.” Unfortunately, he did not break the cycle of
violence, he remained
in the cycle and the
generational trauma
Kathy Piperno
POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
Say #NoMore to domestic violence.
POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
a cell phone and dialed 911 to save Mommy but it was
Physical and sexual assaults, or threats to commit them, are the most apparent forms of domestic violence and are usually
too late. The EMT’s broke down the front door and
the actions that allow others to become aware of the problem. However, regular use of other abusive behaviors by the
batterer, when reinforced by one or more acts of physical violence, make up a larger system of abuse. Although physical as- saults may occur only once or occasionally, they instill threat of future violent attacks and allow the abuser to take control of rthemwoomvane’sdlifehanedrcirbcuomdstayn,cews. hile the police handcuffed Daddy,
he Power & Control diagram is a particularly helpful tool in understanding the overall pattern of abusive and violent be- aTllhaivniorst,hwehichpareussednbcyea boatftertehr teo ecstahblislhdarned nma,inwtaihn condtroildovetrhies iprartbneer.sVtery often, one or more violent incidents are accompanied by an array of these other types of abuse. They are less easily identified, yet firmly establish a pat- tern of intimidation and control in the relationship.
to save mommy.
If you see something, do something!
POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
the actions that allow others to become aware of the problem. However, regular use of other abusive behaviors by the P
COERCION
Physical and sexual assaults, or threats to commit them, are the most apparent foIrNmTsIoMf dIDomAeTstIiOc vNio:lence and are usually
hysical and sexual assaults, or threats to commit them, are the most apparent forms of domestic violence and are usually
AND THREATS:
batterer, when reinforced by one or more acts of physical violence, make up a larger system of abuse. Although physical as- saults may occur only once or occasionally, they instill threat of future violent attacks and allow the abuser to take control of the woman’s life and circumstances.
The Power & Control diagram is a particularly helpful tool in understanding the overall pattern of abusive and violent be-
the actions that allow others to become aware of the problem. However, reguMlarauksiengofhoetrhearfarabuidsivbeybehaviors by the batterer, when reinforced by one or more actsMofapkhiynsgicalnvdio/loenrcec,amrrayk-e up a larger system of abuse. Although physical as-
POWER AND CONTROL WHEEL
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saults may occur only once or occasionally, theiynignsotilul thtrhearet aotfsfuttourde oviolent attacks and allow the abuser to take control of
haviors, which are used by a batterer to establish and maintain control over his partner. Very often, one or more violent incidents are accompanied by an array of these other types of abuse. They are less easily identified, yet firmly establish a pat- tern of intimidation and control in the relationship.
commit suicide, or report
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MALE PRIVILEGE:
Treating her like a servant: making all the big decisions, acting like the “master of the castle,” being the one to define men’s and women’s roles.
ECONOMIC ABUSE:
Preventing her from getting
or keeping a job. Making her ask for money. Giving her an allowance. Taking her money. Not letting her know about or have access to family income.
EMOTIONAL ABUSE:
Putting her down. Making her feel bad about herself.
Calling her names. Making her think she’s crazy. Playing mind games. Humiliating her. Making her feel guilty.
ISOLATION:
Controlling what she does, who she sees and talks to, what she reads, and where she goes. Limiting her outside involvement. Using jealousy to justify actions.
fe
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COERCION
AND THREATS:
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Treating her like a servaCnOt:EmRCaIkOiNng INTIMIDATION: Putting her down.
USING CHILDREN:
Making her feel guilty about the children. Using the children to relay messages. Using visitation to harass her. Threatening to take the children away.
MINIMIZING, DENYING, AND BLAMING:
Making light of the abuse and not taking her concerns about it seriously. Saying the abuse didn’t happen. Shifting responsibility for abusive behavior. Saying she caused it.
she caused it.
POWER AND CONTROL
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Developed by:
Domestic Abuse Intervention Project 202 East Superior Street
Duluth, MN 55802
218.7221.84.712324.4134
Produced aPnrdodisutrcibeudtedanbyd: distributed by:
• 51w2w.w4.n0c7ds.9v.0or2g0 (phone
4612 Shoal Creek Blvd. • Austin, Texas 78756
202 East Superior Street
202 East Superior Street DuluthD,uMlutNh,M55N85058202
4612 Shoal Creek Blvd. • Aust4in6,1T2exaSsh7o8a75l6Creek Bl
5
1
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.407
.9
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0 (phone and fax)
“Fearless in Heels was recommended by my daughter - wow, what a fast read. Told the truth-exactly how
it is, the real thing. Would recommend to others who know or have lived with domestic abuse.”
– Robert Campbell, Media
SE:
Making her lf.
Making her aying mind
her. y.
she does, talks to, nd where
g her ent.
justify
vd. • Austin, Texas 78756
218.722.4134
Produced and distributed by:
512.407.9020 (phone and fax) •
www.ncdsv.org
and fax) •
www.ncdsv.org
Removing the Stigma,
Victim to Warrior, Fearless in Heels Fighting Abuse for them and for me
Presented by Kathy Piperno, Esq
Speaking Engagements Available for Teens to Seniors
College Campus to
Law Enforcement Training
267-220-0335 • Kathy@perfecttensolutions.com
ON-LINE BOOK SALE ON AMAZON
amazon.com/Fearless-Heels-Kathy-Piperno/dp/1737660342
AN UPDATE FROM AUTHOR KATHY PIPERNO
Many virtues are passed down through generations but certain vices, like physical abuse, may also pass through the generations and cause generational trauma. It can be silent, or inadvertently taught as children witness adult behaviors. Consequently, they suffer with anxiety, panic attacks, insomnia, nightmares and low self-esteem.
With Delaware County Court held during COVID for Protection from Abuse only cases, the numbers sadly, averaged more than 200 cases per week, with 5 judges, in 5 different court-rooms, rendering decisions.
#NoMore to Domestic Violence 215.220.0336
Eckell, Sparks, Levy, Auerbach, Monte, Sloane, Matthews & Auslander, P.C.
Serving the Community over 60 Years
300 West State Street, Suite 300, Media, PA 19063 610.565.3701
113 East Evans Street Matlack Bldg, Suite D-1 West Chester, PA 19380 610.431.4600
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